Saying, "I Love You"

Saying, “I love you” to your spouse or significant other plays a vital role in your communication of your feelings towards the other person. This is why most people get so nervous the first time they say, “I love you” to someone they are in a relationship with. By saying those words you are making yourself vulnerable to rejection and hurt while at the same time making a commitment, and that can be a scary situation. I remember the first time Curtis said he loved me. It was just weeks into our relationship. He had just kissed me sweetly and then he looked me square in the eyes and said, “Becky, I love you.” Those words took me by surprise since I was aware of Curtis’s reputation as someone who would not even kiss a girl for months if he did not feel 100% right. And here we were, just a few weeks into our relationship and he was saying those words that every girl loves to hear. So what do I do? Well I got really nervous. And when Becky gets nervous she laughs. That’s right I laughed at poor Curtis. I wish I had been able to compose myself enough to tell him my feelings were mutual, but instead I LAUGHED at him. Curtis is not much of a verbal communicator when it comes to love to begin with, and I probably made it worse. Despite my unintentional rude reaction, he continued to love me even more and our relationship obviously progressed.

In a beginning of a relationship those words really mean a lot because they are fresh and new, packed with a lot of new relationship emotions and hormones. As you settle down with your loved one, often times these words lose some their meaning and become habit more than a sincere thought. For example, what do you say when you are leaving your spouse for the day? What do you say when you hang up the phone having just spoken to your spouse? Those are two examples of saying those words out of pure habit. Does that make them meaningless? Heavens no. But tell me this. When you catch your spouse staring at you with admiration at some random time, and he or she smiles tenderly and says, “Sweetheart, I love you.” How does that make your feel? Those are some of my most prized moments between my spouse and I. I crave those moments because I can truly feel the love my spouse has for me without it being tainted by habit.

So my thought of the month today is keep things fresh in your relationship and tell your sweetheart that you love them randomly as you feel it throughout your day. Text them, call them, or say it to their face. I believe it makes a difference.