Memorial Weekend with Family

Memorial day is a busy day for most families.  Barbecues, outdoor activities, family fun and play time. As always Curtis was invited to go to a few weekend excursions, but being the great Dad and Husband that he is, opted to spend that time with his family instead. Thank you sweets I know how hard it is for you to say no. So what did the family do this Memorial weekend? Lets start with Saturday.

Saturday we actually attempted to go to the air show at Hill Air Force Base. Just as we were getting into the car it started to rain... then it started to rain harder... and progressively it became more of a wall of water being dumped from buckets from the heavens. The highway was crawling at 20 miles an hour and we could hardly see where we were going. Tobin a family friend of ours, was sending us pictures of people huddled under the big bomber planes trying to keep dry. It was then we decided to go to Salt Lake City and check out the new City Creek Center Mall. We hung out there for a good long while hoping that the day would clear up. I did not, so we headed home. The rest of the night we watched movies.

Sunday consisted of Church, a ham dinner, and watching even more movies.

 Dad and the kids watching a show together.

Monday we packed up a lunch and headed to the zoo. It was Jace's first time at the zoo so that made it extra fun.

Sage and the Elephant Expert

Jace pointing at birds during the bird show

Sage and Ashton looking and loving the bird show

An owl swooping by.

A falcon flying over the crowd. Notice the wing position and how different it is from the owl.

Bald Eagle. Favorite bird of Curtis.

We took this same picture almost two years ago. Tried to get Jace to pose for the baby gorilla... did not work out that nicely. Wonder how it will work with a fourth kid in another two years lol.

Curtis being an amazing Dad and holding Jace who was grumpy for a good part of the day.

After the zoo we enjoyed an icecream dinner at Grandma and Grandpa Wilde's place. That's right it was our dinner due to lack of time for a more savory dinner. Every child's dream if you as me.

Finally in memory of those fallen I would like to pay respect on behalf of our family. Thank you to all those who serve in the military. Here are two gravestones that my Wilde side of the family has made a tradition out of visiting this holiday. The first is my Grandpa Woffinden who served in the Navy. The second is my first Mother Karalee who died when I was about two years old. They are both buried next to each other. Thanks for watching over us!

Saying, "I Love You"

Saying, “I love you” to your spouse or significant other plays a vital role in your communication of your feelings towards the other person. This is why most people get so nervous the first time they say, “I love you” to someone they are in a relationship with. By saying those words you are making yourself vulnerable to rejection and hurt while at the same time making a commitment, and that can be a scary situation. I remember the first time Curtis said he loved me. It was just weeks into our relationship. He had just kissed me sweetly and then he looked me square in the eyes and said, “Becky, I love you.” Those words took me by surprise since I was aware of Curtis’s reputation as someone who would not even kiss a girl for months if he did not feel 100% right. And here we were, just a few weeks into our relationship and he was saying those words that every girl loves to hear. So what do I do? Well I got really nervous. And when Becky gets nervous she laughs. That’s right I laughed at poor Curtis. I wish I had been able to compose myself enough to tell him my feelings were mutual, but instead I LAUGHED at him. Curtis is not much of a verbal communicator when it comes to love to begin with, and I probably made it worse. Despite my unintentional rude reaction, he continued to love me even more and our relationship obviously progressed.

In a beginning of a relationship those words really mean a lot because they are fresh and new, packed with a lot of new relationship emotions and hormones. As you settle down with your loved one, often times these words lose some their meaning and become habit more than a sincere thought. For example, what do you say when you are leaving your spouse for the day? What do you say when you hang up the phone having just spoken to your spouse? Those are two examples of saying those words out of pure habit. Does that make them meaningless? Heavens no. But tell me this. When you catch your spouse staring at you with admiration at some random time, and he or she smiles tenderly and says, “Sweetheart, I love you.” How does that make your feel? Those are some of my most prized moments between my spouse and I. I crave those moments because I can truly feel the love my spouse has for me without it being tainted by habit.

So my thought of the month today is keep things fresh in your relationship and tell your sweetheart that you love them randomly as you feel it throughout your day. Text them, call them, or say it to their face. I believe it makes a difference.

Boys will be Boys

After a lot of anticipation waiting for someone to tell us if our baby is a girl or a boy, we found out yesterday that it will indeed be a boy. I was a bit disappointed at first. I really wanted another girl to dress up and well... be girly with. But today I realized something as I was taking my two boys Ashton, and Jace to the doctor... and that is, I absolutely adore my boys! They are great. They are a lot of fun to be around most of the time, and they are fairly simple with little drama for the most part. Curtis and I are however very thankful that we have our little tiny Sage who can be overly dramatic sometimes but is the life of the party wherever she goes. We hope as the oldest in the family, Sage will have a positive and calming affect on the over abundance of testosterone that will inhabit the walls of our home. Speaking of Sage, she was a bit disappointed too... she really wanted a baby sister. But she, like her parents, seems to have moved past the disappointment to the excitement of meeting another bouncing boy.

So some of you are asking if this will still be our last child? Yes, yes it will be. We believe that four is a good number for our family. Now for finding another boy name.... Curtis and I could only come up with one meager name that we both agreed upon last time, so we have depleted our bank of names. Always a bowl full of fun those names! Suggestions are welcome. Curtis only asks that I steer clear of those tree hugging names I tend to lean towards lol.

1 girl 3 boys. These will be mine and Curtis's kids. We are excited to do our best in raising them!

"He came back to life mom!"

Easter Morning came faster than both Curtis and I wanted it to come. The night before we were both up late helping the kids color eggs and getting ready for Easter. To add to things, Jace had been up the night before crying for one reason or another around 4am. We both had a hard time getting back to sleep. So when the alarm went off at 7:45 we both dragged our feet getting out of bed. We did however make it to church. Barely...

The kids were given knew church clothes. Sage got a dress that suited her beautifully, and we gave Ashton a brand new blue colored shirt and yellow tie. Jace got nothing... but I don't think he cared :).

I decided this year not to focus so much on the Easter Bunny. In fact I actually told the kids that I, Mom, was responsible for all the candy, giving the Easter Bunny absolutely no credit. Then I asked the kids if they knew what Easter was really about. Sage was quick to tell me that it was about Jesus Christ and his resurrection. Ashton needed a bit more explanation. So I reminded him that Jesus died for all mankind. Then I asked him if he knew what happened after he died. He shouted out with excitement, "He came back to life mom!" I loved how excited he was... I always tend to remember his resurrection with reverence... but why not be excited. It is an exciting thing if you think about it! Because of what He did, we are able to return to Heavenly Father one day again. That is pretty exciting!

After our Church services, we headed over to my parents house in Orem. We had a great meal and enjoyed each others company. Later that day my brother Andy came over to let us know he was engaged to Mary Beth! Yay for both of them. And then we hid candy and eggs for all the kids and let them have a little Easter egg hunt.

Life really is good for our family. We truly have been blessed with everything that we need... And I an truly grateful for Jesus Christ the son of God. Without him I think my life would feel empty even with all my earthly possessions and blessings. He gives me a purpose that is beyond the superficial meaning of our short life here on this Earth. Happy Easter everyone.

Ashton, Tallie, and Sage

Ashton, Sage, Tallie, and Jace

More of the kids

While we were hiding the eggs Jace fell helplessly asleep in Uncle Bon's arms. So this his how he spent his first Easter Egg hunt. Later my mom put candy in both of his hands as he slept. It was cute.

Ashton Turns 5

"Hey Ashton", mom called. "Yes mom," Ashton replied. "What do you want to do for your birthday this year?" Ashton excitedly proclaimed, " I want a Green Eggs and Ham Cake!!"

That's right folks. This year Ashton wanted his birthday to be all about Green Eggs and Ham. I actually tried to talk him out of it since I figured it was a passing fancy but he stuck to his guns and so on March 29th we celbrated his 5th birthday in a very green Dr. Seuss sort of way.

At first I was just going to make him a bunch of cupcakes topped with green meringue eggs. But then I thought to myself that its just no fun to blow out five candles on a cupcake. So I made a small ham cake (also green) to go with the cupcakes. Then we loaded up his presents and headed to IHOP for dinner so that he could actually eat green eggs and ham for dinner (they have a special going on right now featuring just that). We were met there by family and ate breakfast for dinner, watched Ashton open presents, and blow out the candles on his cake. Here are some pics.

Green Eggs and Ham Cake and Cupcakes

Ashton opening a few presents.

Ashton Blowing out the candles! I can not believe he is already 5.

Ashton was so happy to have his green cake.

Being Becky, I of course forgot the camera as I always do! So all his pics were taken with a Phone... not the best of quality but at least its something!

Note: Suprisenly enough, Ashton actually does not own the book Green Eggs and Ham.

Winter Blur

This winter has been quiet for our family. It really has not even felt like winter. Here in Lindon we have hardly seen any snow, and if it were not for the snow in the mountains, I would question its existence in Utah. To add to the oddity of this winter the temperatures have been mild. Venturing outside without a coat is common in the neighborhood as you see children playing together as if it were spring. No huge events have occurred since I last wrote. So I figured that I would focus on individuals in this blog entry.

Lets start with the head of the family Curtis. Curtis's pager has not been going off as often as it has in the past. Maybe this is due to the lack of snow... or maybe people are just getting smarter. Either way its been nice. When he does get called out its mostly for medical purposes such as a fracture, or a lost person. So far all calls have turned out positively with no deaths. That is always a good thing. Other than Search and Rescue he has been busy working hard for his family. Curtis never complains about having to work and does his work very well with meticulous attention to detail. He has been bringing his work ethic home and can be found working in his garage on his mustang most nights. I have never met anyone who works as hard as Curtis. To be idol bothers him greatly unless he is simply exhausted in which he then turns to me to get love. I don't mind at all when that happens and happily rub his head while watching something on TV. Curtis really is a great husband and father. It has been fun to watch as he has interacted with his first baby. He is a very attentive father. He also makes great efforts to make sure that his older kids know that he loves them even though he is the main disciplinary parent. Our family loves Curtis very much.

Now lets move on to the other head of the house... Me:) I am about 13 weeks pregnant. I have been struggling with morning sickness for about two months. I really can not complain though. I have only thrown up once which is a huge success for me. And as of now, as long as I stay fed, my stomach does not give me too much hassle. My energy which was non existent a few weeks ago is slowly coming back... which has been a good thing for my bathrooms and kitchen floor. Curtis has been a trooper through all of it as I have pushed him away and fallen asleep as soon as he comes to bed. He is happy to be slowly getting his wife back. When I am not feeling good I basically just curl up in a ball on my bed and ask to be left alone. But like previously mentioned, it has gotten better. Now I find myself trying to play catch up on house work and trying to find things to look forward to so that I am not bored out of my mind. Most if not all of my focus is truly on my children and my husband.

Now for the bright one of the family, Sage. Sage has been very content with going to school and interacting with her friends there. She seems to love her life for the most part and does those things she dislikes (homework, cleaning her room) with a wiliness that she has recently developed. She is learning to be responsible and is a great help with her two younger brothers. Lately she has been into writing poems. One of my more favorite ones she has written goes something like this.

I love you
I love you
I love you divine
Could you please give me some bubble gum
Your sitting on mine
And would you be mine.

Where she comes up with this stuff I do not know. But its cute. Sage has also been getting really excited to get baptized this year. She has an official time and date. She will be getting baptized in Lindon on June 30th at 11 am. So for those who would like to attend you can plan ahead! I asked her why she wanted to be baptized. She simply said, "Because I love my Heavenly Father and want to live with him again someday." She truly has a testimony of God the Father and his son Jesus Christ. I only hope that I can be the mother she needs to help it grow and mature as she gets older.

Ashton my little smiley boy is getting so big! He is now learning to read and can read some simple books. He really has a joy for life. He is always smiling and seems excited over the smallest things. He craves attention from his parents and siblings and prefers not to be alone. He would rather sit there and watch me clean and even help me clean then be alone downstairs watching TV. He spends most of his time either at school, with me, or with his sister after school. Sage is always kind enough to involve him in her play. And Jace really does love Ashton as well as he displays his affection with kisses and hugs.

Jace is no longer really a baby. He is very much a toddler as he now walks everywhere he goes and gets into everything while he is at it. His vocabulary is growing every week. Just to name a few words he can say; duck, eyes, yuck, book, dog, up, yummy, car, cracker and no. It seems like every week he learns another word or two. This week i discovered that if you tell him to put something in the garbage he knows exactly what you mean and will walk into the kitchen and put it in the trash. I don't remember teaching his this but somehow he picked up on it. I guess the little guy understands more than what i give him credit for. He has been very much into reading books lately. If I even sit in his chair in his room for one second he is running up to me demanding that I read him a book. And one book is not good enough... oh no, it has to be 10 books. Jace is a great kid.

Last but not least, Little Unborn Final Dudley Child # 4. That's quite the title. We got to see this little person a few weeks ago on ultra sound. According to measurements he or she is scheduled to be due around September 24th which happens to be my brother Cam's birthday. Happy Birthday Cam! We will find out the sex of the child in April. This time around we all want a baby girl but know that we will love him or her no matter what she or he is.

As a family we celebrated our second anniversary on the 20th of March. Curtis and I got to go away for a weekend at Wolf Creek. That was nice. The kids go to spend that weekend with Grandma Dudley. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves.

We have also planned a trip to Oregon and the Seattle area. In Oregon we will be enjoying some Wilde family time on the beach, and later some more personal time with Cams family. In Seattle we will get to spend quality time with my Grandma and Grandpa Wilde and with my Aunts, Uncles, and cousins. I am really looking forward to that since I have a deep love for Seattle. I always feel at home there.

And that is about it! Hope all of you and your families are doing well and that this winter is treating you right!

Fourth and Final Dudley

It was the end of August. I was going about my day cleaning the bathrooms when all of a sudden I had the strangest urge to get pregnant. I quickly dismissed the thought simply because my little Jace was only 9 months old and I like to wait in between kids to give both my body and stress level a break. Throughout the day these thoughts kept on creeping back into my mind and I kept on pushing them right back out. After all it would be crazy to get pregnant when Jace was so young! That night I had a dream where I was pregnant doing day to day things with my three kids.

This trend of crazy thoughts and dreams continued for the next 3 days. I then decided that it would be appropriate at this point to tell Curtis. "Sweetheart, I know this sounds absolutely insane but lately I have had the strange impression that I should stop taking my birth control and get pregnant". His eyebrows raised and he looked at me like I knew he would. "That is crazy dear, but if you feel that way then go for it." I proceeded to tell him how these promptings had been strong and insistent like it was meant for me to get pregnant right away. He agreed with me and told me it sounded like our destiny was laid out for us. It was then we decided to wait allowing me to finish two more weeks of birth control pills so that I could have a period before I got pregnant ( In the past with all three of my kids I have gotten pregnant within 2 weeks of stopping birth control). The next day my period started in the middle of my pills which never happens. I took that as a sign that I needed to follow my crazy promptings right then and there so I did not take a pill after that day.

I started planning my calender. Lets see, I will get pregnant in two weeks, I will get sick in about 6 to 8 weeks... I will find out what it is in four months, and will have the baby in nine. One month pasted... I was not pregnant. This was a whole new experience to me. It had never taken more than two weeks and now I was faced with the fact that it just might take longer this time and I could not plan my life out to a "T" like I liked to do. I was going to have to wait it out like most women do! How awful!

Two more months went by and I was still not pregnant. Then on December 17th I finally got a positive. I was so excited! But 4 days later I lost it. That's right, I had just had my first miscarriage. Did you know that 20% of all early term pregnancies end in miscarriage due to things not forming right? That was what my doctor told me to help me feel better. It worked to some degree but I was still emotionally on a roller coaster and cried for a good 24 hours straight. In the end I was thankful for having had this experience so that I know what its like, giving me a chance to somewhat relate to those who have had a miscarriage. It really is hard to get excited about the little person inside of you just to lose them.

After this experience I started to think that maybe I was done. Maybe my body had had enough. Maybe I was not meant to have four kids like Curtis and I had planned.

January 14th was a Saturday where Curtis was busy in the garage working on his Mustang. He needed to go out and get some new cleaning supplies from Harbor Freight. I asked him if he could pick up a few pregnancy tests for me since it had been about a month since I had lost my baby. He did, and I took a test. It was a very faint positive. I was pregnant again. This time I told no one but my husband. What if I lost it again? I just didn't want to have to tell someone I had a miscarriage like before. So I waited.. that is till now. My morning sickness has kicked in which can be an indicator of a healthy pregnancy. Or at least I hope it is!

So yes. I am pregnant with my fourth and final kid. This will be the last time that I Becky Dudley will be with child. Kinda a crazy thought that I am moving slowly into a new stage of my life. Soon in a few years I will not have anymore babies in the house. Yet another crazy thought. Makes me want to cherish the moments I have now... even though they may be stressful at times and take all my free time and energy. I wonder who the little critter inside of me is... Is it my girl I have been wanting? Or will it be another sweet baby boy? Who knows... and I suppose in the end it really does not matter. Right now I'm just hoping for a healthy pregnancy and an even healthier baby.